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Is this really worth playing anymore?
Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4135
By Asura.Artemicion 2010-01-15 17:55:02
You know, I could relate to the OP through similar experiences within the game, and as a result was the indirect cause of me quitting the game 5 months ago. Social fallouts are never easy to overcome or deal with regardless of whether it was good buddies or perhaps something a little more personal and intimate.
Either way, your best bet is to take the game in moderation and never take anyone or anything too seriously. As sad as it may seem, knowing a person is a life long process and quite frankly never really is set in stone since it is in human nature that people change. Try not to take things in game too personally or get sucked into drama-traps. What you need is some good ol' RL to smooth out the emotional gravity this game gives you.
Log out, grab a buddy, have a beer and maybe ask someone cute out. Have a good time; it'll do your soul some good and hopefully soften some edges to your emotionally rigid disposition.
After dealing with in game drama with girls, gear and gil left me looking at reality alot like this guy; it's just one big bad joke, have fun with it.
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Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4135
By Asura.Artemicion 2010-01-15 17:57:33
Leviathan.Lennavan said: The problem is you have had a lifetime of being told you need meds and you're screwed in the head. What you need is a lifetime of being told to take personal responsibility for yourself.
If you won, you'd have a bomb-*** internet only gf who would go away as soon as SE shuts down the servers. Yay for teenager love.
Couldn't have said it better myself.
 Fairy.Deist
Server: Fairy
Game: FFXI
Posts: 79
By Fairy.Deist 2010-01-15 17:58:15
Shiva.Darkmacabre said: Talking from experience eh? lol Apparently you never grew up because you still release that hatred on other posts which I find even more so childish. lol I released ***on my own post. Wanna talk about your problems? Post your own and see what others think, or....just stfu. ^^
Awesome. Nice turn around - you're cured!
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Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4135
By Asura.Artemicion 2010-01-15 18:01:01
I give props for opening up through the most hateful and childish medium possible: The Internet. Luckily for you this community is a little more empathetic and understanding than most. Hope you feel better dude.
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Server: Sylph
Game: FFXI
Posts: 3663
By Sylph.Beelshamen 2010-01-15 18:02:36
Shiva.Darkmacabre said: Talking from experience eh? lol Apparently you never grew up because you still release that hatred on other posts which I find even more so childish. lol I released ***on my own post. Wanna talk about your problems? Post your own and see what others think, or....just stfu. ^^
I know one thing, you're absolutely not wrong in the head. If you were, you wouldn't have pointed that out.
Fairy.Deist
Server: Fairy
Game: FFXI
Posts: 79
By Fairy.Deist 2010-01-15 18:06:46
Sylph.Beelshamen said: Shiva.Darkmacabre said: Talking from experience eh? lol Apparently you never grew up because you still release that hatred on other posts which I find even more so childish. lol I released ***on my own post. Wanna talk about your problems? Post your own and see what others think, or....just stfu. ^^
I know one thing, you're absolutely not wrong in the head. If you were, you wouldn't have pointed that out.
You would, and you wouldn't. For example - if you come to the understanding that your reality doesn't match with other people's then... then you would know something if a miss.
But this is the wrong place for a talk like that which I am starting so.. meh.
Server: Odin
Game: FFXI
Posts: 49
By Odin.Kraytos 2010-01-15 18:07:11
Shiva.Darkmacabre said:
Someone please hack my account and delete all my ***because I don't have it in me to quit this prison of a game.
forward your pol id and password to me and i'll "hack" you :p
in a more positive note, keep your chin up. it's not ffxi that is *** up and cruel, it's all life--especially most of the people you meet in it. but there is always someone or two that have a bit of integrity in them and that's what makes life (or ffxi in this case) worth sticking with.
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 Pandemonium.Liquidz
Server: Pandemonium
Game: FFXI
Posts: 615
By Pandemonium.Liquidz 2010-01-15 18:21:40
Sell your account and your gils, give half to Haiti and take the other half to buy a bus ticket to as far as the money will get you. Once you exit the bus, walk back home and take that time to think back on all this. You should feel better by the time you are back home. Good luck.
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 441
By Shiva.Darkmacabre 2010-01-15 18:25:07
Fairy.Deist said: Sylph.Beelshamen said: Shiva.Darkmacabre said: Talking from experience eh? lol Apparently you never grew up because you still release that hatred on other posts which I find even more so childish. lol I released ***on my own post. Wanna talk about your problems? Post your own and see what others think, or....just stfu. ^^
I know one thing, you're absolutely not wrong in the head. If you were, you wouldn't have pointed that out.
You would, and you wouldn't. For example - if you come to the understanding that your reality doesn't match with other people's then... then you would know something if a miss.
But this is the wrong place for a talk like that which I am starting so.. meh.
That's what I've been waiting to hear for some time. lol
Ragnarok.Psyence
Server: Ragnarok
Game: FFXI
Posts: 471
By Ragnarok.Psyence 2010-01-15 18:43:19
Well... finding love in an MMORPG sounds pretty ... unrealistic to me... But then again, I met my girlfriend on ICQ 8 years ago while all my friends were warning me about "the girls from Internet".
What you're feeling could have happened in a different environment, and you probably would have felt the same if it did. Just make sure you realize that FF XI has nothing to do with what happened. This game, and the people you meet in it, are totaly separate things.
If you studied in University and met a girl who studied there, and she broke your heart and changed University, who would you feel in the loser? And most importantly, would you feel like quiting University because it's not "how it used to be like"?
For new players, the game is still fresh... Walk around with your AF sometimes, just for fun, and when you get sick of it, take a break.
Oh, and do try to see what you can do to help about Haiti. Their problems will make you realize how you life isn't that cruel after all.
Server: Siren
Game: FFXI
Posts: 2680
By Siren.Clinpachi 2010-01-15 18:53:27
It's funny you brought this up, and I'm not saying funny as in laughing at you.
If you don't have much of a social life in real life it can be easy to find yourself attached to in-game people even in the romantic sense.
The difference between you and them is that you actually had the balls to post this on an internet forum which in a sense deserves positive merit.
People will flame or laugh at you sure, and i know you probably expected that.
My biggest point is that there will be an eventual change in your life for the better where you realize what's actually important in life outside of video games or whatever you may do as a hobby on your computer or whatnot.
Under every circumstance possible avoid e-relationships especially in video games. It's actually proven that many guys play girl characters and may even flirt to get ahead and then drop you. This is common and you are not the first at all.
Instant messengers or myspace (lol) might prove higher chances but still not a smart move. The best thing you can do at a chance for real love (or a chance at it) is to cruise the mall with 1-2 friends... doesn't matter how geeky you think you are.... hell even a public library... just hang out in or near sections you like and glance around every now and again.
A wingman is pretty important honestly.
I'm no love doctor and i can't say that I've had a great time with women in my life either, but I've been lucky enough to find someone by age 25. Someone actually worth the world.
In short... just relax and enjoy the ride of life and see where it takes you. Try new ***and see where it goes ^_^
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 441
By Shiva.Darkmacabre 2010-01-15 18:56:52
Yeah totally agreed about the whole ppl not FFXI thing. That's what I meant on the OP, sorry if it came out the wrong way. I think I just write a bit too dramatic. lol But I suppose only words like those could describe how I felt at the moment. FFXI itself is a pure game, it's the people that have the power to keep it nice or to murk it up.
By Ashitaka 2010-01-15 19:09:49
Shiva.Darkmacabre said: Yeah totally agreed about the whole ppl not FFXI thing. That's what I meant on the OP, sorry if it came out the wrong way. I think I just write a bit too dramatic. lol But I suppose only words like those could describe how I felt at the moment. FFXI itself is a pure game, it's the people that have the power to keep it nice or to murk it up.
I went through same stuff you did, so I know how ya feel, but nothing's better than a rl woman... just make her play games with you irl >:O.. it's just that much better
Server: Pandemonium
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4261
By Pandemonium.Eternaltriumph 2010-01-15 19:13:22
Yeahwell. The trick to any online relationship is really don't look. Don't try. >_> If either of you look, it's gonna end horribly and things will end in extreme spite.
As Ashi said though, having a woman irl who plays games with you is like hitting the *** jackpot. Hearing the female you shagged an hour ago yell "*** YEAH PREDATOR MISSLE" is a nerd wet dream. Just go with the flow of life, ***happens like it happens. Overthink, and things fall apart. I just stopped caring, and I got myself something nice.
Point being. At the thread title? No. Not without some RL friends to hang with.
By Ashitaka 2010-01-15 19:14:27
Pandemonium.Eternaltriumph said: Yeahwell. The trick to any online relationship is really don't look. Don't try. >_> If either of you look, it's gonna end horribly and things will end in extreme spite.
As Ashi said though, having a woman irl who plays games with you is like hitting the *** jackpot. Hearing the female you shagged an hour ago yell "*** YEAH PREDATOR MISSLE" is a nerd wet dream. Just go with the flow of life, ***happens like it happens. Overthink, and things fall apart. I just stopped caring, and I got myself something nice.
Point being. At the thread title? No. Not without some RL friends to hang with.
Exactly.. sex + games all I need
 Shiva.Marty
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 8
By Shiva.Marty 2010-01-15 20:07:34
Darkmacabre in Dynamis <Found it>
By Ashitaka 2010-01-15 20:12:56
Sylph.Ascher said: I've had the same experience man. The thing is, you would have been in the same situation irl too. The same kind of semi love, romance, whatever you want to call it happens from real life too. Girls play, tease, talk to you a lot like you are really part of their life, but really just using you. I'm not saying they are all like this I'm just saying you cant have your heart out in the open, but you don't want to be the harda** that never talks either. It's a bunch of give and take with friendships before you see if it's serious and online relationships are possible (my sister's BF was met on myspace and I swear they are going to marry!)
Back to the subject of FFXI being a prison and not being worth playing. I'd say it all depends what you are playing for. I started out playing for fun like any other game and learning from it. Then I got in the "Too close" zone of friendships, taking them too seriously and had a lot of drama. Then I was the quiet never talked to anyone mean guy that played only for the best and to get EG gear all that I could be! Last I went back to treating it as a game I could get on whenever I wanted and still played with 2 of the best friends I'll ever have. Don't play for anyone else's sake.
Things change in time tho, so don't make it a thing you expect to do for years to come.
If you feel you need to quit, quit. If you just quitting for pity, don't quit if you can still play for yourself w/o drama only with fun doing what you WANT to do.
I started to work a lot more and in college too so doing EG events screwed me over. I purposely transferred my character to a new server so I could get away from an EG shell I knew and that would force me to play less but when I played, play for fun. Met new friends too so it was still all good.
Anyway man, it's normal how you felt and acted, because the same can happen in real life. If this game feels like a prison to you try to enjoy it a a GAME and see how that goes. Balance your priorities and see how that goes and quit if you must but with a great attitude.
Meh. I AM married to some one I met on the game so boo. Have been for some time >:D...
Bahamut.Megbite
Server: Bahamut
Game: FFXI
Posts: 67
By Bahamut.Megbite 2010-01-15 20:13:47
When I was 18, it was a lot harder to find chicks then when I was 16,17,20+. 18 is a hard age. You're expected to date girls 18+, but as it seams, those girls are into dudes that can buy them drinks, have more cash and have a nicer car then you.
Suck it up. things get better. Hit the gym, get lean and mean, focus your self-pity into an aggression that will pump you up like arnold was back in the day.
After time spent on improving yourself physically, you should also have help cure yourself emotionally as well.
Get a new hobby. it's time. go to school, hit the gym, suck it up, and life will get better.
By the way. I'm 29 happily married to a woman I shag and meritpo with. We found each other whilst in university, and it turns out real life commingling can work out for the best.
Go you!
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By Ashitaka 2010-01-15 20:17:01
Quote: I shag and meritpo with.
Yeaaaah, do both at the same time.
Asura.Hit
Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 765
By Asura.Hit 2010-01-15 20:39:01
Ashitaka said: Quote: I shag and meritpo with.
Yeaaaah, do both at the same time.
My fiance and I play.. this may or may not have taken place.
Server: Ramuh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4118
By Ramuh.Thunderz 2010-01-15 20:39:43
Stop wasting your time and come play MW2 o.o
Unicorn.Dulcinea
Server: Unicorn
Game: FFXI
Posts: 300
By Unicorn.Dulcinea 2010-01-15 20:40:15
Ashitaka said: Quote: I shag and meritpo with. Yeaaaah, do both at the same time.
Yes, playing FFXI with the person you actually live with is TEH AWESOME. ^^
I wish my man would start playing again, but he got burned out a while back because of Dynamis and CoP.
Anyway, though, Darkmacabre, I sent a pm to tell you about something I think you might benefit from, to help when you start feeling overwhelmed by stuffs. ^^
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 441
By Shiva.Darkmacabre 2010-01-15 20:40:23
Ramuh.Thunderz said: Stop wasting your time and come play MW2 o.o
lol I do play it sometimes. Gamertag is: xX Shemhazai Xx
Server: Ramuh
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4118
By Ramuh.Thunderz 2010-01-15 20:43:12
Shiva.Darkmacabre said: Ramuh.Thunderz said: Stop wasting your time and come play MW2 o.o
lol I do play it sometimes. Gamertag is: xX Shemhazai Xx
play moooooar o.o! haseyo is Prestige lvl 8 o.o you must beat him nao
Server: Hades
Game: FFXI
Posts: 20
By Hades.Deadfly 2010-01-15 21:08:46
Wedding Dress ~ 400k
Wedding Ring ~ 600k
Wedding Cake ~ 100k
Finding out your Mithra wife's a man?
*Priceless*
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 441
By Shiva.Darkmacabre 2010-01-15 21:10:34
Hades.Deadfly said: Wedding Dress ~ 400k
Wedding Ring ~ 600k
Wedding Cake ~ 100k
Finding out your Mithra wife's a man?
*Priceless*
lol....no it's a she alright.
Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 4135
By Asura.Artemicion 2010-01-15 21:16:13
Hades.Deadfly said: Wedding Dress ~ 400k
Wedding Ring ~ 600k
Wedding Cake ~ 100k
Finding out your Mithra wife's a man?
*Priceless* Wait... THERE'S CAKE?!
Asura.Hit
Server: Asura
Game: FFXI
Posts: 765
By Asura.Hit 2010-01-15 21:23:33
Asura.Artemicion said: Hades.Deadfly said: Wedding Dress ~ 400k
Wedding Ring ~ 600k
Wedding Cake ~ 100k
Finding out your Mithra wife's a man?
*Priceless* Wait... THERE'S CAKE?!
Incoming outdated video game cliche;
The cake is a lie.
Server: Shiva
Game: FFXI
Posts: 23653
By Shiva.Flionheart 2010-01-15 21:45:13
You set yourself up for a fall.
FFXI =/= real life.
Again, reality check. Remember haiti?
It's funny really how it all turns out to be. Anyone remember that first feeling of playing FF for the first time? lol You run around with RSE gear killing lvl one mobs and loving it.. I'll never forget that feeling. Then you make friends and meet wonderful people who become closer than you'd ever imagine from a video game.
But after years of playthrough and broken memories I've come to realize FF is now nothing more than a place that people seem to forget about what matters in life.
Every single friend I met has forgotten me. I spent hours helping them get what they wanted just because I enjoyed it. In the end I'm tossed aside. It's as if I was just another NPC to them.
I met a beautiful girl on here once who became my best friend. We did everything together lol, farming, quests, duo, you name it. Eventually she became my girlfriend. It lasted for 6 months...six entire months before I found out she was married and only used me as a play thing for pleasure. You'd think it's nothing but when I really believed....when I really loved her...it honestly broke my heart.
Eventually while trying to love FF again I met another while trying to sell an Enhancing Sword. We ended up talking all day and night. lol It was...amazing. For some reason I came to really enjoy her presence. So I told her my life story...about my very first gf who died on her birthday, about my abusive parents, everything.... and about my ex-gf on FF who almost had me at suicide.
And so it went on....she comforted me and I fell for her. She promised to love me forever and be at my side. She promised to never hurt me and I did the same. Perhaps now it sounds so foolish but believe me at that moment of romance....reality changes.
Perhaps she loved me too, I'll never know. We were together a few months before she began to act strange...to have me question things. But whenever I asked she'd push away.. I began to fear that maybe it was happening all over again. But I also fought to hold the trust I had for her....I mean...she swore with all her heart that she loved me. And all I ever gave her was honesty and compassion.
....Today I found out she switched servers and tried to hide from me out of nowhere. Just like my ex... After swearing to never hurt me she did just the same as my ex-girlfriend did.
Laugh at me as you read this, while I cry as I write this. I'm merely a stupid kid who fell in love with the most beautiful girl he's ever met, but in the end she hurt me more than anyone will ever hurt me. I loved her...I still love her. But a few minutes ago I was forced to find where she fled and tell her that I loved her and if she truly never wanted to see me again I'd let her go...because I only wanted her to be happy...
I won't write any names because it's the manly thing to do. They know who they are...they may even be reading this at this very moment. The only thing I want to say is that even though this is merely a game...there are real people playing with real feelings and real lives. Is gil and gear really worth destroying someone's life? Whatever happened to playing for fun and personal enjoyment? I have no regrets for helping out the people I helped before...but for Christ's fucking sake stop fucking with my heart...
Call me emo. call me whatever the hell you want. But I'm just another regular player who loved playing this as much as anyone else. And I see what really happens in this game. I know how people truly are... In this game our true personalities come out and my god...lol...if this is how humans really are..then I sure hope that some fucking meteor shatters the planet. Because I'd rather be a worm than a human being.
If you took the time to read this then thank you... I have no one else to talk to so the FF community seemed just.
Someone please hack my account and delete all my shit because I don't have it in me to quit this prison of a game.
*EDIT* NEVER MIND ABOUT THIS LAST STATEMENT WTF???? EMO MOMENT MUCH?
sigh... edit#2 for those who misunderstood this statement: "But after years of playthrough and broken memories I've come to realize FF is nothing more than hell itself." People seemed to have taken it literally. I meant people in general. And all the bad shit that happens on it.
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