I'm sorry to say but the idea of unconditional love, whether towards "family" or towards friends is rather... Weak.
Caring for humans in general is very different than unconditional love and I feel is more what you're aiming at. It's the idea of no one(or at least many people) really wants to see someone else to die or be hurt. But that's very different from unconditionally loving them and simply being related by blood or being loved by the other person does not instantly mean you must feel the same towards them. If this were the case you'd essentially be saying a stalker is someone you should love.
We choose to love, or rather acknowledge, those who we feel are worth the time. That's going to be different for everyone. I for one am on the side that blood means little to nothing. I keep my family members in my life because of who they are as people not because they birthed or raised me, if they ever change in a way that I find displeasing, yes I will "disown" them.
Love is earned, not simply given.
On the stalker point, that is not unconditional love. That is someone
taking the belief they are in love when in reality they are unhealthily feeling obsession. Regardless of how much they badly want it to be love.
I gave many examples of when people feel the genuine unconditional love and we will have to definitely agree to disagree. Along your behaviour a son could walk home and decide to change his life and the father simply disown him and stop loving him, "because he did something that displeases me." That is not how love works.
And unconditional love having to be earned? That is not a friendship we're talking about. You cannot force your child to earn your love when he is born for example.
It sounds like you're just talking about quality friendships which are great sure but turning that into family is pretty rare. That is not unconditional love.
As humans we do not choose who we love, we choose
who we express our love for.Fathers do often disown their children for changing something about their life though. Have you not seen the many homosexual who come out to their families only to be thrown to the curb or sent to "rehabilitation" classes to attempt to convert them to a state they find acceptable?
I didn't say unconditional love is earned, I said unconditional love does not exist, because nothing is unconditional. There will always be a condition for why we care for someone. Whether it's a result of our personality or the result of actual events, those are conditional.
When your child is born? Most parents love them because they are of their own body, because they "worked" for that child. That child has earned their love. However, as you said in your last post, there are those who give up their child, and I'm not talking about adoptions that were made to benefit the child due to things such as poverty, I'm talking about those who willingly give up on a child, sometimes before it's even born.
Family will always be defined by individuals, even if a government has a different definition of it. Our family is who we care about most, those who we feel are worth our time and have earned their spot in our lives.
That said, I'll agree to disagree and I'll leave the discussion there.