FFXIAH Linkshell Ni

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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 09:06:44
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I'll embrace it... I just already gave the GF a warning that if her mother tries to start ***while I'm drinking I won't have full control over what I let slip out. ._.;
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 Asura.Lolserj
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By Asura.Lolserj 2016-12-16 09:18:31
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Shiva.Spathaian said: »
I'll embrace it... I just already gave the GF a warning that if her mother tries to start ***while I'm drinking I won't have full control over what I let slip out. ._.;

If I've learned anything about having family I abhor it is definitely the fact that one of the best methods of not getting into arguments is the smile and nod method.

I probably have one of the worst types of personalities when it comes to embracing such a method as well. Just ask Meshi. I'll argue over anything, especially if I'm being annoyed by it. Just ask him about yasuo, he'll tell you.

But it does seem to work more in person, no matter how much smug satisfaction you can get proving someone wrong or giving them what they truly deserve sometimes it just isn't worth it. It can hurt the ones you truly care about, and can make any possible meaningful interactions between you and the person you hate impossible to come by, and I do have some experience with this. I do not get along with my stepdad on most things, but I typically try to avoid the subjects we disagree on and I will state that I don't believe a discussion on those matters will lead to anything productive and will move on to something both of us can have a meaningful discussion on.

I'm not saying that this is the situation you're in though, I am just trying to offer any advice that may be relevant to your situation.
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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 09:28:00
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Oh no you're definitely right in all that and it's usually the method I'll take, especially with family. But her mother... really pushes my buttons and it's not just because of her opinions or the way she acts but because of the way everything she does negatively impacts... pretty much her whole family.

At this point she pretty much considers herself a damn matriarch and almost every action she makes or word she speaks demoralizes one of the other family members in some way, and none of them will speak out because it just causes more friction for them at home.

I'm seriously just tired of seeing my GF come home feeling like ***because of something her mother said, because all she seems to do to her is downsize her issues and make her own, which are usually the same or more trivial, into the biggest and most important thing in the world. I'm tired of seeing her son, a 16 year old who reminds me of myself in a lot of ways, feel like he can't be a damn kid because his mother knows everything and has the audacity to belittle his opinion on everything.

She is... literally the most helicoptery parent I've ever met and it bugs me to no end.

But... I respect the GF enough not to do anything. Alcohol... may not help in that matter. >.>;;;
 Valefor.Sehachan
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By Valefor.Sehachan 2016-12-16 09:31:29
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If things start turning bad, just have sex with your gf in the middle of the room. That should distract everyone from any arguments happening.

*always gives good advice*
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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 09:36:35
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Valefor.Sehachan said: »
If things start turning bad, just have sex with your gf in the middle of the room. That should distract everyone from any arguments happening.

*always gives good advice*
This... This could work.

I should take advice from Seha more often.
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 Bismarck.Misao
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By Bismarck.Misao 2016-12-16 09:39:52
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Shiva.Spathaian said: »
She is... literally the most helicoptery parent I've ever met and it bugs me to no end.

you know what happens to helicopters?
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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 09:48:23
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Bismarck.Misao said: »
Shiva.Spathaian said: »
She is... literally the most helicoptery parent I've ever met and it bugs me to no end.

you know what happens to helicopters?
Proof that I am Rambo.
 Bismarck.Misao
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By Bismarck.Misao 2016-12-16 09:51:24
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On a serious note, it seems that I wont be going to LA tomorrow, so I should be home for the most part
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 Valefor.Sehachan
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By Valefor.Sehachan 2016-12-16 09:52:54
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Misaollywood.

Only the best cat movies.
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 Lakshmi.Flavin
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By Lakshmi.Flavin 2016-12-16 09:56:42
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People are shitty but the reality of it is that unless you're willing to separate yourself from it completely it's something you're setting yourself up to deal with... I don't really recall how old you are or what type of situation you and your gf are in but I dated a girl once awhile back where here parents well they weren't terrible people because you know they didn't beat her and they fed her clothed her and put her through school and such... but I disagreed with them quite sharply on a lot of things... not just because they tried to control her and make her into the pretty little doll they wanted or because they electronically monitored her every position or when they would berate her for not being the perfect little white hetero girl... they would always hold money over her head too as a way to leash her in to continue paying for school and the other creature comforts... I sometimes imagine they spent the rest of the time demonizing me to get her to break up with me lol...

Anyways the point being that you have to deal with these people on her terms... she has the personal relationship with them and it's their choice on how to go forward with that relationship for their own reasons... so I wouldn't think of it as standing up to them or eating their ***but rather respecting your partners wishes and just being there for them regardless... I try to stay out of those family squabbles as much as possible because family is important... whether they are now or you like em ATM or not they're usually the ones you're stuck with in a bond regardless for better or worse... I've seen some people get others to leave them behind cuz they were being unreasonable and promise em the world and then they're gone a year later and the person is worse off than they were before...

In any case... just because you think they're not being all that good or you disagree with em on how they choose to raise their kids you also have to look at it as an important relationship you shouldn't be stepping in between unless she asks you too... that's for her to decide without your help... if she's over 18 she has no obligation to stay there and put up with her ***and her mother can't force her to stay so there's obviously something keeping her there... your job is just to support her not to make snyde comments about how you can't control yourself when you get drunk... the answer to that then is don't get drunk and who really wants to be sober besides us mennonites lol...
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 Lakshmi.Flavin
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By Lakshmi.Flavin 2016-12-16 09:57:26
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Valefor.Sehachan said: »
Misaollywood.

Only the best cat movies.
Garfield?
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By Ramyrez 2016-12-16 10:03:02
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Valefor.Sehachan said: »
Misaollywood.

Only the best cat movies.

What about cat songs? It is DPF, neutered as it may be without our Evil Overlord and our dowager executioner.

YouTube Video Placeholder
 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 10:16:15
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Bismarck.Misao said: »
On a serious note, it seems that I wont be going to LA tomorrow, so I should be home for the most part
What you're saying, is I should kill everyone off sooner?
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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 10:16:43
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Lakshmi.Flavin said: »
People are shitty but the reality of it is that unless you're willing to separate yourself from it completely it's something you're setting yourself up to deal with... I don't really recall how old you are or what type of situation you and your gf are in but I dated a girl once awhile back where here parents well they weren't terrible people because you know they didn't beat her and they fed her clothed her and put her through school and such... but I disagreed with them quite sharply on a lot of things... not just because they tried to control her and make her into the pretty little doll they wanted or because they electronically monitored her every position or when they would berate her for not being the perfect little white hetero girl... they would always hold money over her head too as a way to leash her in to continue paying for school and the other creature comforts... I sometimes imagine they spent the rest of the time demonizing me to get her to break up with me lol...

Anyways the point being that you have to deal with these people on her terms... she has the personal relationship with them and it's their choice on how to go forward with that relationship for their own reasons... so I wouldn't think of it as standing up to them or eating their ***but rather respecting your partners wishes and just being there for them regardless... I try to stay out of those family squabbles as much as possible because family is important... whether they are now or you like em ATM or not they're usually the ones you're stuck with in a bond regardless for better or worse... I've seen some people get others to leave them behind cuz they were being unreasonable and promise em the world and then they're gone a year later and the person is worse off than they were before...

In any case... just because you think they're not being all that good or you disagree with em on how they choose to raise their kids you also have to look at it as an important relationship you shouldn't be stepping in between unless she asks you too... that's for her to decide without your help... if she's over 18 she has no obligation to stay there and put up with her ***and her mother can't force her to stay so there's obviously something keeping her there... your job is just to support her not to make snyde comments about how you can't control yourself when you get drunk... the answer to that then is don't get drunk and who really wants to be sober besides us mennonites lol...
You're right. Like... I don't even have any extra input on this one.
 Bismarck.Misao
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By Bismarck.Misao 2016-12-16 10:35:49
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Shiva.Spathaian said: »
What you're saying, is I should kill everyone off sooner?
SCORCHED EARTH!
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By Ramyrez 2016-12-16 10:41:45
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SCORCHED EARTH?

I LOVED SCORCH!

Best tank game ever!

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 Asura.Lolserj
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By Asura.Lolserj 2016-12-16 10:52:31
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Shiva.Spathaian said: »
Lakshmi.Flavin said: »
People are shitty but the reality of it is that unless you're willing to separate yourself from it completely it's something you're setting yourself up to deal with... I don't really recall how old you are or what type of situation you and your gf are in but I dated a girl once awhile back where here parents well they weren't terrible people because you know they didn't beat her and they fed her clothed her and put her through school and such... but I disagreed with them quite sharply on a lot of things... not just because they tried to control her and make her into the pretty little doll they wanted or because they electronically monitored her every position or when they would berate her for not being the perfect little white hetero girl... they would always hold money over her head too as a way to leash her in to continue paying for school and the other creature comforts... I sometimes imagine they spent the rest of the time demonizing me to get her to break up with me lol...

Anyways the point being that you have to deal with these people on her terms... she has the personal relationship with them and it's their choice on how to go forward with that relationship for their own reasons... so I wouldn't think of it as standing up to them or eating their ***but rather respecting your partners wishes and just being there for them regardless... I try to stay out of those family squabbles as much as possible because family is important... whether they are now or you like em ATM or not they're usually the ones you're stuck with in a bond regardless for better or worse... I've seen some people get others to leave them behind cuz they were being unreasonable and promise em the world and then they're gone a year later and the person is worse off than they were before...

In any case... just because you think they're not being all that good or you disagree with em on how they choose to raise their kids you also have to look at it as an important relationship you shouldn't be stepping in between unless she asks you too... that's for her to decide without your help... if she's over 18 she has no obligation to stay there and put up with her ***and her mother can't force her to stay so there's obviously something keeping her there... your job is just to support her not to make snyde comments about how you can't control yourself when you get drunk... the answer to that then is don't get drunk and who really wants to be sober besides us mennonites lol...
You're right. Like... I don't even have any extra input on this one.

just to add a little additional input I would say that (as long as you agree with them or have no strong feelings one way or the other) try to support your SO's decisions regarding her relationships with her family as much as possible

It means a lot to someone if you try to play nice because they care about people you dislike, and it also means a lot to someone if they know that you support them in thinking that someone they know can *** off and die for all they care.
 Valefor.Sehachan
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By Valefor.Sehachan 2016-12-16 10:57:38
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I don't think one should indiscriminately agree with their partner, but they should be honest while remaining supporting.
"I don't agree with you, but I'll fight on your side no matter what" kind of way.

But this is not a suggestion, just my personal way of thinking.

edit: obviously I mean about things that you're not personally invested in, like a bout between them and a friend or their own family
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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 11:01:27
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Bismarck.Misao said: »
Shiva.Spathaian said: »
What you're saying, is I should kill everyone off sooner?
SCORCHED EARTH!
I wonder how annoyed everyone would be if I added tomorrow to the schedule on such short notice...
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 Asura.Lolserj
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By Asura.Lolserj 2016-12-16 12:26:12
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Bismarck.Misao said: »
Shiva.Spathaian said: »
What you're saying, is I should kill everyone off sooner?
SCORCHED EARTH!

Like... you find the pipsi and have no room in your bag so you drink it?
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 Bismarck.Misao
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By Bismarck.Misao 2016-12-16 12:30:39
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Or just put a mentos in it for the hell of it
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 Caitsith.Zahrah
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By Caitsith.Zahrah 2016-12-16 13:14:56
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Hmmm...Where's Mos?
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 Shiva.Spathaian
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By Shiva.Spathaian 2016-12-16 13:19:30
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Caitsith.Zahrah said: »
Hmmm...Where's Mos?
Lets do a quick recap.
Anna Ruthven said: »
Lakshmi.Flavin said: »
Shiva.Spathaian said: »
So... did Mos actually take off? Because it has been... eerily quiet as of late.

Nik has been missing too... ban?

...

Guys?
Nik appearantly did get banned... which is always nonsense ***... whichever mod (I'm assuming the dog abandoner) did it deserves to be (censored)...

Mos is just being mos... he's probably busy...
Wasn't her, Nik was pretty much asking for it. He'll be back soon and more evil than ever. If anything I did him a favor and gave him something to plot over and time to plot his evil deeds.

Basically Nik got banned, Mos is probably elsewhere out of protest. Hard to say where or when/if he'll be back.
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By Caitsith.Zahrah 2016-12-16 13:32:21
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Christmas needs to hurry up and get here.

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 Bismarck.Misao
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By Bismarck.Misao 2016-12-16 13:35:14
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Caitsith.Zahrah said: »
Christmas needs to hurry up and go away.
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 Asura.Lolserj
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By Asura.Lolserj 2016-12-16 13:55:12
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 Ragnarok.Hevans
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By Ragnarok.Hevans 2016-12-18 18:11:25
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zsa zsa gabor died. i posted here instead of another thread or creating a new thread cause i figured she deserved the recognition in the classy thread. she'll still always live on through our own zah zah.

rip
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By Anna Ruthven 2016-12-18 23:35:16
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This came to mind so I'm posting for... Whatever. schadenfreude I guess. You guys all know I fail to notice when I have an opportunity, but there was once I didn't but still didn't hook up. I don't consider this a fail and I'll tell you why.

Let me set the stage here; I'm a senior in high school and when semester changes a sophomore girl gets put into my class. We sit next to each other. Her, her friend, and this loud senior who skipped half the time.

So, she's half-Mexican, half-White. Pretty face and while she's not petite, she isn't fat either. Had a speech impediment that I found adorable. We start talking, and eventually end up a couple. One day she starts mentioning that I'm the first guy other than her dad to actually show any sort of concern about her. I'd nag about her smoking and whatnot, nag when she'd do stupid ***, etc. She starts to occasionally mention this and I dunno why really.

Fast forward a few months, she and her friend, being in a different grade had a different test than I did so we were separated all class. Class lets out and her friend leaves for her class.

Let me stop here to describe the friend; friend is a pretty blonde girl, petite, slightly shorter than my GF.

Class lets out, friend leaves, GF comes up to me, mentions me nagging and being concerned again and then says something odd. "She (the friend) was talking about how you actually care..." after a few minutes; "...she said she likes you."

I start thinking back and being oblivious as I am realize that I'd occasionally catch her looking at me, she'd look away and kinda grin. She'd also talk to me more than before I was with my GF.

Yeah, I was oblivious up to this point but I still had my chance...and I didn't take it. The GF and I broke things off when she moved away. Her friend and I talked occasionally but nothing came of it for various reasons.

*shrug*
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 Valefor.Sehachan
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By Valefor.Sehachan 2016-12-19 05:24:14
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Chatting with a girl often doesn't count as gf you know.
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