You have a wife, you don't know how handy they are.
I do most of the cooking actually, you sexist misogynistic pig.
slow cookers are the worst invention ever. they represent everything wrong with lazy american cuisine slowly warning individual ingredients into a bland homogeneous tasteless goo. if you put the same ingredients in the oven it tastes ten to a hundred times better.
hell the little betty crocker lightbulb easy bake oven is better...
smokers at least add smoke flavor... slow cookers add a horrible school cafeteria nightmare flashback flavor. yuck